Been a weird day on the internet, hasn’t it? I mean like, obviously every day on the internet is weird, but today feels especially weird.
First, Coleen Rooney went all ‘WAGatha Christie’ on us, accusing Rebekah Vardy of leaking fake stories about her life to The Sun. Then Rebekah was all like, “Not being funny, but I couldn’t have done that because I don’t need the money and I am also — for some reason it’s necessary to mention — pregnant”. While all this was happening, the Met Police were busy kettling a giant pink octopus making its way towards Downing Street. See, we told you: a mad day! Not to be outdone though, here’s Jared Leto bringing up the rear with some end of the day bizarro shit.
Someone has stolen his head.
No not the actual head. That severed Gucci head. The one he took to the Met Gala, inspired by the massive viral moment from Autumn/Winter 18 when Alessandro Michele sent models down the runway carrying their own terrifyingly realistic severed heads. He paired it with a red silk, full length smock encrusted with diamonds. But now it’s gone.
In an interview with GQ, Jared explained that the head has gone walkabouts and he’s convinced it’s been stolen. “I think someone may have stolen it,” the 30 Seconds to Mars singer said. “If anyone out there finds it, bring it into your nearest Gucci store in exchange for a pair of dirty sneakers.”
It’s presumably quite hard to move a replica of Jared Leto’s head on the black market, but given that it cost around $11,000 dollars to make, we’re not surprised that he’s upset he can’t find it. Perhaps the first step is to keep an eye out in the pawn shops of New York City, or to call up the Met Museum to check if he had one too many and left it in a cleaner’s cupboard at the gala back in May.
Alternatively though, we have one suggestion for where it may turn up. Who do we believe is the severed head thief? It’s …………………. Rebekah Vardy.