There was a time when we followed Drew Barrymore’s Instagram feed for nothing more than travel pictures and constant dog content. No more! Now, we’re devoted followers of her hashtag, #beautyjunkieweek, a week she created so she can gush about the products she loves (no word as to whether it was created in competition to i-D’s Beauty Week). She doesn’t just feature her own line, Flower Beauty, instead happily Instagramming the hell out of anything she likes. Barrymore really is a beauty junkie — the sheer volume of products she pulls from her cabinets to rave about is astonishing. Let’s have a look:
Here, Barrymore attends to a zit with nothing more than a leaf of aloe plucked from her garden. It’s in fact an epic four-part post that chronicles her digging out the flesh of the leaf to lay upon this monstrous zit which befouls her gorgeous cheeks. The before and after pictures are really quite something — Barrymore has absolutely no qualms about going sans fards on her ‘gram. The best part of her characteristically rambling quote is surely “Then figuring I had nothing to loose [sic], I dug out the meat of the live plant stalk…”. This could be the plot for Hereditary 2.
“I don’t have lines as much as I look like the crypt keeper” is the truly beyond caption she came up with for this picture of her morning routine, replete with multiple bottles of lotion and photograph stuck to the mirror. Other essential facts we can glean from this photo include that Barrymore likes to drink really, really large styrofoam cups of Coke, which is maybe why she has dark circles in the first place, and that she uses a hell of a lot of different products.
See? Stars, they’re just like us — they have horrible bleaching accidents too. This is a particularly sorry affair which appears without remedy, until you see the next post. Barrymore’s had more legendary bleach jobs than we can count, from her peroxide looks in the 90s to her flame red Charlie’s Angels mane (which must have taken quite a lot of upkeep).
One of Barrymore’s other great passions is eating, specifically Japanese food, and even more specifically ramen. This is exactly the kind of thing she needs, obviously, as we imagine when she gets into a bowl of noodles she really goes for it.
Peak Barrymore, because the caption includes the both existential and vaguely insane phrase “And I’m like ‘why am I this crazy chicken?’” Truly, we are all the chicken. This advice is great as it doesn’t really involve doing anything, apart from adding a spoonful of green weirdness to your drink. Evidently, Barrymore feels the same way as us, even though she’s a world famous actor and producer. She looks at people with their hair done, and “nice linen clothes,” wonders how they do it, and so goes out and buys strange powders and potions to make herself feel better. Thank God we have Drew Barrymore to make us feel seen, and help us get rid of zits.