When Kira and I first organise to meet to talk about her first solo single in two years, Tension has something like 60,000 plays on Spotify. At the time of writing, it’s ticked over 300,000. At least forty of those plays are mine, and — I mean this — that’s not just because I’m writing about it. Tension is the kind of pop song you hear on the radio twice and suddenly it’s in your life, it’s living in your head. There’s nothing you can do about it, not that I know why you’d even want to.
Now about as Melbourne as it gets, Kira grew up North of Sydney, where suburbs meet sea. She performed in karaoke contests at the constant prodding of her mum. A shy kid, it serendipitously primed her for what is now looking like the thing she was more or less born to do. Kira started appearing on our screens with Kira Puru and The Bruise, a rock band who formed when Geordie Malone approached Kira after a burlesque show of hers to say “I wanna be in your band.” After the success of their two EPs, Kira released a single out on her own, All Dulled Out, and featured on tracks with Urthboy and Yeo. Tension, which is now on high rotation at Triple J, is Kira’s official side-step into pop.
When I arrive on the set of the shoot, it’s just wrapped and Kira’s swimming in a white fur stole, worn over a long kilt and band t-shirt. Her cheeks are glowing red. We find somewhere to sit and talk about anxiousness, sexual awakenings, and how much white people love Kendrick Lamar.
Kira! Good afternoon! How was the shoot?
It was good! A little bit confronting… seeing high definition photos of my face. But good. I thought I would get better at having my photo taken over time, but it’s just not happening.
Have you done it a lot?
Yeah. I wish there was some way you could just… not do it. I suppose like Gorillaz or Sia or something.
Or Lil Miquela.
The 3D girl?
Yeah, the GCI Instagram pop star.
Is she based off a real person?
I don’t know. I don’t think so because she’s so quintessentially Instagram-looking that it’s almost too good to be true.
Do you think it’s a man? I thought it was a man. The gaze feels masculine to me.
Ha. Let’s talk about Tension. It’s really good, congrats. I’ve had it on a loop for a couple weeks now.
Thank you. I haven’t put anything out for a long time so I was waking up ready to vomit every day for a few weeks before it came out, because I just didn’t want it to flop.
Really! Do you get anxious?
Oh yeah, deeply.
I guess you sometimes have to be if you want to be good.
Yeah, I think it’s a sign that I care about it. I get hugely anxious. Even normal social interactions make me anxious. If I say something in a social interaction that doesn’t feel right I’ll think about it for weeks afterwards.
Wow, you do not come across like that at all.
Yeah, I think you learn to pretend to be confident when you’re constantly in front of other people. Because being awkward makes other people feel awkward. I’ve been performing for a long time and I guess I’ve learned how not to make other people feel uncomfortable.
When did you start performing?
My mum used to drag me to karaoke competitions when I was a kid.
Oh my god, she was a stage mom.
Yeah she was but she was like, drinking port and smoking up the back, so not like your typical stage mom.
So somewhere between Drop Dead Gorgeous and Dance Moms.
Yeah, yeah. I was a pretty shy kid, but I performed a lot at home so Mum forced me to do it for other people. I guess I just got used to it, and started to like it. But I didn’t start actually writing music until my late teens.
Are you an only child?
No, I’ve got a younger brother. He’s a little shithead, I love him so much. He was kind of a brat and I was a timid, straight-A type.
Where did you grow up?
Cardiff, in Newcastle. Bit of a low socioeconomic, suburban vibe. It was… alright. I always felt that whenever I travelled into the city everyone was suddenly really cool. That was probably my first experience with class — living where I lived and just thinking that was what life was like, and then going into the city and seeing… looks. Wearing looks to school was never on my radar, the idea of constructing a look while also going to school.
I was the same. Do you write music alone or with people?
At the moment I’m writing with people because I want to learn their skills. And I like how your work changes when you write with new people — I’m not interested in remaking the same things all the time. I like writing alone but I think the results I get when I’m doing that are a bit journal-y? It’s more like music for therapy rather than music for other people.
I tried to write some songs once upon a time and I just wrote the worst, most obvious personal stuff. But that’s ok. I’ll just stay over here doing the thing I know how to do.
Yeah. Staying in your lane is good. I mean, I’m not taking up rock climbing any time soon. I think it’s important to know where your lane is and only ever veer slightly out of it.
Absolutely. Wait. Unless! Here’s the thing: my friends and I have this game called For The Friendship, and one friend will say to another “do this thing For The Friendship.” it’ll be something really ridiculous and out of your comfort zone but you’re doing it to prove just how much you love the friendship. It’s not like, actually compulsory, but it’s fun to see how quickly you stop caring about the danger or the awkwardness of something. I can really recommend it.
Yeah, I like this. When we were on tour with my old band we used to play this game called Pass The Buck and you needed just a dollar coin, and you’d say like “I’ll give you a dollar if you do… whatever” and then if they do the thing, they get the dollar, and they get to spend the dollar on someone else’s dare. It’s kind of the same thing. Whoever’s got the dollar, you can really stretch that.
I love it. These games are as much about anticipation as anything else. Another of my friends said to me, one time, maybe on like a Tuesday, “This Saturday night, at 12AM, I’m going to make you do something For The Friendship.”
Haha! That’s some tortuous shit, though! Did the anxiety cripple you in the lead up to that moment though?
No. Honestly I’m not an anxious person.
Lucky you! I often wonder what it would be like not being crippled by anxiety or depression, or worrying about my impact on the world. I sometimes think worrying about stuff is like in-built quality control that allows you to check that everything you do is okay. Do you think that sometimes not worrying means some stuff that’s not okay slips through?
Yeah, it does. But I’m too busy assuming I’m going to experience the best possible version of any situation.
Wow. That is cool. Are you late?
I am always late. I am never not late.
I was reading this article this morning about people who are late to things, it said they’re more optimistic but also they have less chance of heart disease and all these other things. Have you ever suffered extreme grief?
No.
Grief definitely changed me — my perceptions on mortality and stuff. Everything just sort of clicked in for real [after that]. The game, my life, really started then, because I had context. After my Dad died a couple years ago I became petrified of death. I’d walk upstairs with a glass in my hand and I’d envision myself falling backwards down the stairs and smashing my head open with the glass, really dark shit.
That is really interesting.
Yeah, I’m wondering if you could get through grief and still experience that level of positivity that you do.
Wait… who’s interviewing who here!
Yeah sorry, that’s a thing I do.
When you were performing as a kid, how did you do?
I think I was a talented kid but I was really only doing it for my Mum.
What was school like for you?
It was okay, I was a bit of a loner. I spent lunch times in the art rooms. But then I went from that to smoking ciggies in the bathroom with the bad boys. I think it was around that sexual awakening time in everyone’s life when you realise you have that sexual currency… even if you’re a dork.
I went to an all girls school and I never really had that opportunity.
Were there any queer kids there?
No one was out, and if they were then I wasn’t in touch with my own sexuality enough to notice. Which is so sad. It was pretty strictly Catholic.
Imagine how great it could’ve been!
I know, I know. There was just so much internal propaganda about how gayness or queerness was this deeply evil sin, so it’s really not surprising that everyone just stayed in their closet.
Did you ever see or hear of the play about the rose with the petals that fall off?
No…
It’s like, every girl is given a rose when they’re born and every time they have a sexual experience before marriage, a petal falls off. And when you get married you give your husband that flower, and if you have sex too many times you just give your husband a twig, with no petals on it.
Oh my god. What does this guy want a rose for anyway?
I don’t know!
Did they tell kids this at your school?
Yeah! The worst part is that I spent a good part of my life learning this and telling it to myself and now I have to unlearn it. Which is just annoying more than anything else.
I think we’re on the back foot a bit having grown up when we did, because there are a lot of pretty accurate terms to describe, you know, all manner of sexual preferences, sexual relationships, and genders now.
We did grow up in a more difficult time — the language we were taught and the way we were taught to be comfortable with our bodies. Modesty was a big part of my life growing up, being taught through my family and through school that my modesty is connected to my worth. I struggled with my sexuality for a long time. Longer than a lot of my friends, because I don’t know if I can brand what I feel — I guess it’s pansexuality — but I didn’t know what that was. I had a bunch of queer friends but there was no one who was experiencing what I was experiencing, which made it feel wrong. I mean, being queer in a queer space that feels accepting is so underestimated. When the Yes vote came through, I was walking down Smith Street and I just felt so good.
That’s what they talk about when they talk about Pride.
Yeah! I can actually relax and feel like what I am is accepted by all these people. I was surprisingly moved, because I live in Fitzroy which can be a really white, dickhead dude scene.
So you’re DJing tonight, what’re you going to play?
When I first got this job the brief was “I don’t care what you play just as long as everybody knows it.” So… wall to wall bangers basically. But it could be like, Bowie or Prince or Whitney, or it could be Miley, Katy, or Kendrick. White people love Kendrick.
We do! We do. We love it almost as much as the straights love gay marriage. And I’m about to fulfil that stereotype by saying that I love Kendrick Lamar. Kira, I love him. I have such a crush on him that I don’t know what to do, it’s not sexual at all but I so badly want to be in his presence.
He’s an amazing person. Even if you don’t get on board with his political ideals, he’s such an amazing performer and his music is dope, so there are a lot of entry points. I think one of the big reasons people love Kendrick is that when you sing the words to his songs, you feel powerful. It feels as revolutionary as he meant it to feel. And white people don’t have anything to fight for, or against, so I think that feeling is attractive.
Wow, yeah. Very true.
Yeah, so I usually keep a few Kendrick songs for the end of the night to really get people going. I try not to play Ginuwine’s Pony but if you play that song at the end of the night, like 3am, when everyone’s really lit… You’re gonna see some shit.
Kira is playing two shows in support of Tension, tickets here, dates below:
Friday 9th March @ the Oxford Art Factory Gallery, Sydney
Saturday 10th March @ The Workers Club, Melbourne
credits
Text Isobel Beech
Photography Phebe Schmidt
Makeup Georgia Gaillard