You either die a hero, or you live long enough to see yourself pivot to blogging. That’s the quote, right? Anyway, scammer extraordinaire Anna Delvey has done just that, transitioning from the plucky grifter who infiltrated New York’s fashion elite to the author of Life is Hard: Enduring COVID-19 in an Upstate NY Prison.
“I understand that prison is supposed to be all about having no rights and being forced to settle for less,” she writes, an interesting take on the carceral system to say the least, “but when I’m being casually told that granola bars are being replaced with powdered donuts, it’s extra hard to maintain hope and stay positive.” Oh, baby.
The degree to which the diary — which you can read via a dedicated website to it — is intended as a parody piece is unclear, but this is almost certainly the point. Anna decries her lack of access to cocoa butter with a similar fervour to the very real impact of coronavirus on her life as a prisoner, as case rates and associated deaths in prisons skyrocket.
When describing the wait to find out about confirmed COVID cases in her compound, Anna writes wryly: “The suspense is killing me and everybody else in the bungalow. I just finished both the latest Vogue Italia and 032c I’ve been reading simultaneously and it seems like an inappropriate time to start anything new, much less to get into the new CR Fashion Book. Don’t you just hate being interrupted in the middle of Carine Roitfeld-orchestrated cover spread? The worst. I’ll wait.”
The ex-socialite also informs us that she’s been reading Ulysses, making her own ‘“nut mylks”, and tending to a personal herb garden during her stay at the Albion Correctional Facility where she’s being detained. Classic quarantine.
If this isn’t enough Anna for you, the second diary instalment, titled Life Is Hard Part 2, is listed on the website as ‘coming soon’. Given the chaos of this year, we can only assume a podcast is to follow.