As the model-slash-actor lands her first American Vogue cover, Cara Delevingne opens up about the world of fashion, her personal experience of mental illness and her girlfriend, musician St. Vincent. Here’s what Cara had to say.
On modelling…
“I admit I was terrified to leave. I mean, the bubble gives you a kind of dysfunctional family. When you’re in it, you get it. And the second you’re out of it, you’re like, What the hell just happened?”
On partying…
“The life of the party is an easy part for me to play. It rots your insides, though.”
On mental illness…
“All of a sudden I was hit with a massive wave of depression and anxiety and self-hatred, where the feelings were so painful that I would slam my head against a tree to try to knock myself out. I never cut, but I’d scratch myself to the point of bleeding. I just wanted to dematerialize and have someone sweep me away.”
On her mother’s addiction…
“It shapes the childhood of every kid whose parent has an addiction, you grow up too quickly because you’re parenting your parents. My mother’s an amazingly strong person with a huge heart, and I adore her. But it’s not something you get better from, I don’t think. I know there are people who have stopped and are fine now, but not in my circumstance. She’s still struggling.”
On love…
“I think that being in love with my girlfriend is a big part of why I’m feeling so happy with who I am these days. And for those words to come out of my mouth is actually a miracle.”
Credits
Photography Angelo Pennetta (The Wise Up Issue, no. 322, Winter 2012)